Texas PTA Admin

Each one of us is fighting a battle that no one else knows about. Battles come in all sizes, from small to immeasurably big. Sometimes I hear about them from a fourth-grade boy who doesn’t look up from his shoes when he speaks. Or from an eighth-grade girl who hugs and doesn’t let go for a minute or two. Or even from the high school athlete who doesn’t seem to have a care in the world, except he does.

I present an anti-bullying/pro-kindness workshop to over 20,000 Texas students each year. It is my goal to speak to as many educators, students, and parents as I possibly can. It is also my hope that I can motivate kids to make changes themselves. I am inspired by this incredible generation of students and how they are going to change the world. I hear so many amazing stories of kindness, generosity, empathy, and acceptance. I also hear of heartbreak and hurt. It is a constant reminder that growing up is astonishingly hard.

One story has stuck with me for years. I met him as I was leaving a campus to grab a cup of coffee before my afternoon workshop. I had my hand on the door to leave when I heard a deep voice calling my name from behind. When I turned around, I had to look up. “Jonah” towered over me at six foot three. He asked, “Would you have lunch with me? I am one of the kids you talk about. I am one of the kids who sits by themselves at lunch.” I sat down across from this young man at an empty table in an otherwise chaotic lunchroom. He informed me no one would sit with us. No one sits there but him. The rest of the cafeteria was standing room only. The thunderdome of high school played around us as he spoke. Jonah shared that his bullying situation got worse in middle school. Everyone always made fun of him for being poor. They would make fun of his clothes and his mother’s car. They would call him dirty even though he would take special care to shower before and after school every day to make sure he wasn’t.

By the time Jonah entered high school, some of his bullies started to throw handfuls of pocket change at him because they knew he would pick it up. Jonah told me he would usually ignore the pennies and nickels, but he would always pick up the quarters. He hated picking them up, but he knew it cost thirteen quarters to wash his little sister’s clothes and that maybe, if he could wash her clothes, no one would call her dirty or gross either. Maybe no one would know she was his sister. Maybe no one would know she was poor. As we sat in an otherwise crowded lunchroom, no one stared at us or stopped to say hi. No one sat at our table, even though there were few other seats. I felt like we were invisible.

“A simple act of kindness might not change the whole world for everyone, but it can change at least one person’s world.”

The next day I met with students from the school determined to make their campus a softer place. They formed a Kindness Club and we spent the afternoon brainstorming youth-led kindness initiatives. The air was electric with positivity and hope, but I couldn’t shake Jonah’s story. I asked one of the leaders of the group if they knew Jonah. They paused and then recalled he was in their English class the year before. I asked them to tell me about him. They shrugged and said the only thing they knew was that people threw change at him. As the words left their mouths, I saw realization wash over their faces. Their indifference had made Jonah seem invisible. The students on campus saw the behavior towards Jonah day after day and remained silent. It was just something that happened. It just wasn’t happening to them. It was just part of the thunderdome.

I often tell students, “If you say nothing, it means you approve.” So often the least likely person to do or say anything about bullying is the person being bullied. How different would it have been if maybe the very first time someone threw change at Jonah the best friend of that person told them to stop? How different would it have been if someone paused to help or reported the behavior? How different would it have been if someone sat down at that empty lunch table once in a while?

The students from this campus were incredible kids. They desperately wanted to change the world in such huge ways. Hearing their dreams on how to make a kinder world was inspiring. It was shocking to them that they didn’t need to look much further than their own backyard or lunch table. They just needed to shed their indifference and open their eyes to the blind spots.

I encourage students all over the state to check their blind spots. A simple hello, a borrowed pencil, or being a friend are all ways to create a softer space. A simple act of kindness might not change the whole world for everyone, but it can change at least one person’s world. If we all take a moment to look around and check our blind spots, we will discover that no one is invisible and the change we want to see in the world might be as simple as sitting down at a lunch table.

As we begin another school year, sit down and talk to your students about the importance of kindness. Talk to them about people who may be different. Talk about ways to be kind. Talk to your students about how to confront their friends if they make hurtful decisions. Some of these conversations are tricky to navigate. But we, as parents and teachers, owe it to our children to have them. By enabling our children to be the same kids who say hello or sit at the lunch table, we are helping to transform all campuses into softer places.

Growing up is hard work. There is no instruction manual. We have to write it as we go along. But for me, Jonah’s story became its own chapter.

As we approach long summer days filled with more time spent outdoors, one of the most important things we can do for our children is teach them how to be sun safe. The sun emits powerful ultraviolet (UV) rays that can harm our skin and potentially lead to skin damage, sunburn, and even skin cancer.

According to the American Academy of Dermatology, one blistering sunburn during childhood can double a person’s chance of developing melanoma, the most deadly type of skin cancer. What’s more, half of our lifetime sun exposure occurs before the age of 18; therefore, it is beneficial to engage children early to foster better sun safety behaviors across the age continuum and help reduce their lifetime risk of developing skin cancer.

Getting children to practice sun-safe behaviors may not always be easy. So, it becomes even more important to make sun safety fun and something children want to do. As a parent of two young children, a key priority in my household is to make sun safety relatable and easy to understand. As an example, I explain that sun safety protects our skin much like wearing a helmet protects our heads or brushing teeth protects our teeth and gums. The following are additional strategies to consider this summer and year-round.

Model Behavior

Sunburn during adulthood can also lead to increased skin cancer risk. Practicing sun safety will show children that you think sun protection is important for yourself and for them.

Use sunscreen and lip balm

• Use broad-spectrum sunscreen, SPF 30 or higher
• Apply sunscreen at least 30 minutes before going outside
• Re-apply sunscreen every 2 hours, and soon after sweating or swimming
• Spread sunscreen generously (enough to fill a golf ball or shot glass) from head to toe and don’t forget the nose, ears, neck, and back of the hands.

Parent tip: To make sunscreen application engaging for your child, make fun shapes or write your child’s name out with the sunscreen on their arms and legs. Depending on your child’s age, ask them to spread the lotion evenly on their skin.

Cover up

Wear wide-brimmed hats, sunglasses that block 99-100% of UV rays (check the label), and protective clothing such as sleeved shirts (not tank tops) and knee-length or longer shorts, skirts, or dresses.

Parent tip: For maximum sun protection, consider having your child wear UV-protective clothing especially at the pool or beach.

Find Shade

Aim to plan outdoor activities in shaded areas whenever possible. If there is no shade, be creative – use umbrellas, tarps, or tents.

Note: Between 10 am and 4 pm, the sun’s rays are more harmful. Ensure that you and your child are extra-protected during this time by engaging in all sun safety behaviors described above. Outdoor activities can also be planned for earlier or later in the day to avoid the midday sun, when possible.

Make Sun Safety Fun

The University of Texas MD Anderson Cancer Center developed Ray and the Sunbeatables®: A Sun Safety Curriculum, which features superhero characters who travel around the world using their sun safety superpowers of applying sunscreen, finding shade, and wearing wide-brimmed hats, protective clothing, and sunglasses.

Consider relating sun safety to the Sunbeatables superhero characters or other characters that children enjoy. Use songs (the Sunbeatables Program includes a few known household tunes such as “Are You Sleeping?”) and be creative with sun safety games.

Parent tip: Use shadow length to demonstrate when it is safe to be outside. During early morning and late afternoon, shadows are longer. During 10 am to 4 pm, shadows are shorter or there is no shadow. This means that the sun is high in the sky, directly overhead, and the sun’s rays are more harmful. Encourage your child to come inside or play in the shade when their shadow is shorter.

Remember that sun safety is critical year-round, even on cloudy or cold days as UV rays can still reach the skin. Advocate for sun safety at your child’s school (like encouraging shade structures be placed in outdoor play areas, updating sun safety policies, etc.) and ask the school to learn more about sun safety initiatives as well as the free resources currently available to them. Work with your child’s teachers and emphasize the importance of sun safety both at school and at home. This is yet another important way that you can positively impact your child’s health for the long-term.

Sun Safety Resources

Sunbeatables Program: An evidence-based sun safety program targeted to preschool through 1st grade students, developed by MD Anderson

Be Sunbeatable™: A sun safety program that builds upon key messages from the Sunbeatables Program targeted to 2nd through 5th grade students; co-developed by MD Anderson and Scholastic

Reducing the incidence of melanoma through primary and secondary prevention initiatives is among one of the shared goals and key partnership strategies between MD Anderson’s Melanoma Moon Shot™ and the cancer prevention and control platform. The Melanoma Moon Shot™ and platform are part of MD Anderson’s Moon Shots Program™, a collaborative effort to accelerate the development of scientific discoveries into clinical advances that save patients’ lives.